To my Sons

William and Ian, I want to leave you a better world than the one that was left for me, but I fear that is impossible and beyond my ability to control. I hope and pray that I am a Father that you can look up too and admire. I will try to be the kind of man that I want you to be, and I will tell you of my struggles and failings so that you will not have as hard of a time as I have.



I would like for you to say what you mean and more importantly mean what you say. That you treat people with respect, especially those that society doesn’t think deserves respect. Respect doesn’t mean being “nice” but treating someone with dignity.


All living things deserve to be treated with dignity no matter if they are a human, dog or plant. We should always remember that the breath of life that God breathed into us, he also blew into them. If we harvest a plant or animal for food we should honor it and give it the best life and least traumatic death that we possibly can. If we have to take a life because of necessity (whether weeding our garden or defending the life of another) we should mourn that life.


We should try to live our life without exploiting others, even if that causes us difficulty. We should be ashamed if our standard of living is only possible because we are abusing and using others. While we cannot change the world we can change the way we impact it and hope that our example convinces others to do the same.


You should never feel that you are better than someone because you have more knowledge, money, clothes etc…. One person’s life is not worth more than another; I say this even though I would gladly choose my Loved ones over anyone else and not feel guilty. Treat all people with respect, especially those who do not show you respect.


Try to think before you act, this will save you much grief and hardship. Remember that once something is done, it may be impossible to undo. So use as much forethought as time will allow. I will warn you that I have found that action is almost always better than inaction. I will endeavor to give you the tools you need to act wisely to the situations that life gives you and the experiences necessary to develop that wisdom. I hope this will enable you to think while you are acting and prevent you from the paralysis of indecision.


Violence never solves problems but only creates new ones. But you might encounter a time when violence is the only viable option that you have. When that is the case use as much as you can summon as quickly as possible, while this may seem counter intuitive it will save pain and suffering to all parties involved.


Try to leave every place you go better than when you found it. Help others when you can, but remember that often the best way to help others is to teach them to help themselves. Making someone dependent on your aid is not good for either your or their dignity. There will be those who try to take advantage of your kindness and willingness to help. This is a price you have to pay and you will become better at identifying those who would abuse your generosity as time goes on. Just remember that if you are in doubt about a person’s motivation it is better to ere on the side of giving until proven otherwise.


Success in life can only be measured by happiness and your sense of self worth. What is simple is not always easy, and the right thing to do often is hard and painful. Do not decide on an action just because it is easy or painless but try to do what is right and just. Try not to leave problems for others to solve if you can fix them now. When you are looking for a solution to a problem try to find a simple one, because simple usually works out better than complex.

I will always try to be the father that you deserve to have and give you the tools that you need to have a happy and successful life. I will fail at times, but I will never stop trying and I will never stop loving you. The two of you are the greatest blessings that God has ever bestowed upon me and I will try to always treat you as such.


I Love You Ian and William, and even though I wish that you could stay small forever, I also look forward into meeting the Men that you will become.


With all of my Love,

Daddy